Feeling Numb

This is a supplemental post to “Feeling Alive”…note these items occur far more frequently than those listed on the sister post:)  Special thanks to fellow blogger “Dragonstrand” for suggesting this sister post.  I have no motivation to put pictures in this post. 

  1. Every morning when my alarm clock goes off (rise and shine…early bird catches the worm)
  2. Shaving and brushing my teeth (daily routine)
  3. Any activity involved with the toilet (reminds me I am an animal)
  4. In the morning after a night drinking too much red wine (where is the Advil?)
  5. During a job interview (why are you passionate about our company?)
  6. During a job review (Charlie Brown…Wa Wa Wa Wa)
  7. Paying my bills (leaving me enough cash for a hot dog dinner)
  8. Paying taxes (rarely get a refund)
  9. Driving my car (listening to crap on the radio)
  10. Sitting in a traffic jam (defeating the purpose of a car)
  11. Looking for a fucking parking place (never get lucky)
  12. Talking to most people and listening to them talk (blah blah blah)
  13. Going through security at the airport (cattle)
  14. Sitting with fellow cows in stalls on the airplane (moooo)
  15. Waiting to get off the airplane (slaughter-house)
  16. Pushing my truck sized shopping cart in Costco (fill it to the brim)
  17. Observing the human race at Costco (what a revolting sight)
  18. Waiting in line at Costco (wondering if there is enough cash in my account)
  19. Hauling Costco groceries into the house (like a mule)
  20. Watching TV (because little motivation to do anything else)
  21. Watching the content on TV especially the news (enjoying the comedy)
  22. Sitting eight hours in a big office or in a cubicle (no difference) staring at a computer
  23. Sitting in a conference room listening to the talking heads trying to sound intelligent
  24. Shopping with a woman (she looks good but god this is painful)
  25. Listening to a woman talk (LOL…just kidding…but please get to the point:)   )
  26. Sitting in a sterile classroom (looks like a prison from the outside)
  27. Sitting in the dentist chair (almost as bad as sitting in the office or a classroom)
  28. Eating just because I am hungry (not to enjoy the food or good company)
  29. Cleaning the house and doing laundry (can’t we invent a robot for this?)
  30. Waiting in line at Disneyland (slaughter-house)
  31. Observing the human race at Disneyland (why am I here again…oh yeah…my son)
  32. Contemplating all the human problems we have created (drowning)
  33. Contemplating the Human Direction…or lack thereof (like trying to stop a Tsunami)

I may add more to this list during the next few days…hope I got you to laugh at least once:)

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14 thoughts on “Feeling Numb

  1. I laughed more than once. And I am a woman. So that is good going, all numbered lists above considered, lol. Life. It just doesn’t get any better. And then suddenly, it does. Who knows why? I’ll go ask my crystal ball now… lol Add away, you are as real as real can get. I think. But what would I know, I believe everything everybody says… especially if it’s on the internet LOL LOL 🙂
    PS
    It is said if we smile even when not feeling happy, the brain will release the same chemicals as if we actually were. It actually works. Some days 🙂

    • Thanks for dropping in princess. Yes these are real observations…and I am glad you took them with a sense of humor. I enjoy self-deprecation…I enjoy being able to laugh at myself…keeps me sane.

  2. Oh, and I think you should add, as the underbelly reflection of item 14 in “Feeling Alive” list, item 34 in “Feeling Numb” list: Coming out of a Strip Club having spent $200 that should have been spent on paying bills or shopping at Costco. Hot dog dinners and PBRs for two weeks now. 🙂

  3. LOL. Somehow, I didn’t come out of that feeling numb. and I laughed more than once! Man, the people at Costco must be quite a sight! Lol. At items 24 and 25 I was especially amused as I can often see the frustration on my one’s face on those days when a point I’m getting to (eventually!) is a long time coming. And smart guy, he came up with a counter attack on the shopping thing: we are wandering around looking for stuff I want and next thing I know I’m being led into electronics/gadgets shops to check out stuff! LOL. It’s a win-win, aside from shoes, I like window-shopping for gadgets too! Ha. 🙂

    • You didn’t feel numb? That is probably because you enjoy shopping and you might enjoy a lot of activity and thousands of people…it is that Type A versus Type B thing going on:)

      When I have to go shopping (like at a mall) and if go by myself…I treat it like a military operation…get in and out under an hour…and that includes looking for a parking place. Although I may get distracted sneaking a few peaks and some beautiful women dragging their mule around:)

      Malls in the U.S. need pubs…walk with your special lady holding hands in the first store…watch her rip through the racks like a speed reader…then walk her out holding her hand, look deep into her eyes…give her a nice smooch on the lips and one on the cheek…and then say…my love…I am going to go to that pub over there for a few pints and I will catch up with you at the 40th store.

      • “Malls in the U.S. need pubs . . .” or perhaps, strip clubs? That might put some restraints on those long girly shopping sprees. 😉

      • Treat shopping like a military operation? Lol. Is there a place one could get that kind of training? all the time I spend roaming the streets shopping could be put to so much better use, may be I could even plant a thousand eucalyptus trees in 6 months:)

        Malls here have pubs, and no parking space. Sweet deal for the guys, right?:)

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